Sunday, 7 November 2010

Multiple loss

The British singer Lily Allen recently lost her baby at six months pregnant two years after a miscarriage at around four months pregnant. The news is very sad. That anybody has to endure the pain of losing their baby twice is just hideous. I think it is the fear of every women pregnant after loss. The fear that the same thing will happen again.

Lily's story has been widely discussed on the news, see this article:
According to the newspaper articles she was roughly six months pregnant and since here in the UK the term miscarriage is used up until 24 weeks the loss may have legally been a late miscarriage or a stillbirth / neonatal death, however most articles refer to it as a miscarriage and go on to discuss early miscarriages (1:4 pregnancies etc). This lack of understanding is frustrating, in fact I really hate how late miscarriages are called miscarriages at all but more on this in a future post.

Another blogger I follow ( who previously lost a baby to pPROM recently announced she had suffered another loss. She was 7 weeks pregnant. To have lost another pregnancy is so unfair. I feel that women who have lost a baby should somehow be excused future pregnancies and just skip to bringing their baby home. Sadly that is not the case, we have to start from the beginning, fight to conceive, fight to not have a miscarriage and continue to fight for the whole pregnancy. I am not sure why I say fight as it gives the illusion we have control over future pregnancies when in reality we have little control. All pregnancy losses are sad but multiple loss is so much worse.


  1. Thank you for acknowledging the pain of my loss... as well as those in subsequent losses. I agree, wishing that we can be excused from further pain after a stillbirth. I did not know that UK used the term miscarriage til 24 wks...someone on Facebook was irate about the misused term too! I hate to see Lily enduring this pain again but we need more celebrities speaking up about their losses too. Don't hear much about them here in the US.

  2. I agree, I spoke to a male colleague at work about it and he had no clue she had to go through labour. I think when people here miscarriage they think she just bled. It's heartbreaking to know what she had to go through. The boy will have a name( at least I hope she was strong enough) it must have been terrifying for her. Her previous loss was at 4 months too. My heart was aching for her and I just hate how life can be so cruel. Patty so sorry for your loss.