http://aidanbabyofmine.blogspot.com/2010/10/dead-baby-math.html
The above post was made a while ago. It is all about comparisons. Comparisons I think all mothers who have lost babies might make occasionally. Comparing the loss of other women who have lost babies to their own loss.
The thrust of the post is that whilst all losses hurt are some worse than others? For example imagine the case of a women with no children and who struggles to conceive needing IVF. When she gets pregnant her baby is born with health issues and dies only weeks old in hospital. Well that is truly awful. So very unfair and I would say worse than a women who has no trouble conceiving, has several healthy full term babies and then has an early miscarriage and goes on to have another healthy happy baby afterwards.
I have found myself wondering how I would have reacted had we lost Orson when the doctors said we would at 21 weeks when my waters first broke instead of 10 weeks later when we had more hope. I would have still been devastated. I recall crying that first night in hospital so well. But would I have found it easier to cope?
Hey,
ReplyDeleteGlad you liked my post. Glad it made you think. That's generally what I like to use my blog for...to excise those thoughts that rattle around in my head and keep me awake at night. I'm sure if you'd lost Orson at 21 weeks you would have been devestated. But hope's a sneaky bitch sometimes, and dangling those 10 extra weeks in front of you may very well have made things 'worse'...but then again, you'll never know.